Distant Horizon - Chap. Seven

Shyamal intentionally missed the coach at Howrah station in which his family was seated.  He boarded another coach. Sayan had seen him trying to board the train but missed out on that part when his father actually succeeded.

Sayan got confused and could not be confident when he said that he saw his father missing the train. Shyamal kept a watch on the members of his family from a distance throughout the journey.

A remorseful Shyamal, mentally depressed, looked for forgiveness for quite some time. He believed that his days were numbered. Before anything disastrous happened, he wanted to find out how his wife, son and father would behave in his absence. Traveling to Tarapith provided him with opportunity for both.

He had planned everything meticulously well, and therefore he retained even the ticket of his father, railway pass for his wife, son, self and money for the journey. The only allowance he made to his wife and son consisted of persuading his father to accompany the family.

The best part of his experiment was that the members of his family did not have an inkling of his scheme. So far they did remarkably well without getting panicky. Continuing their journey to Tarapith their behavior was unbelievably cool.

They warded off the TTE's onslaughts, though Shyamal was behind the second attack. If asked to award points, he would award the highest to Sayan and lowest to his father.

Shyamal had planned well in advance how he would vanish and what would be his alibi. He had even persuaded one of his TTE friends to help him out in his endeavor. Shyamal disguised as the checker with the French cut beard and black goggles.

This disguise helped him remain incognito throughout the journey. He could also remain in the vicinity of his family in case they were in trouble. Shyamal, a very considerate person, failed only once and the accident shattered him mentally.

But Shyamal could not imagine that things would go out of his hand because of some unknown reason. Instead of going to Tarapith, his family decided to visit Sadhika's ashram at such a remote place on earth. It would have been a lot easier if his family had gone to Tarapith. It was safer, and Shyamal also could keep a close watch, concealing himself in the crowd.

After Sadhika accompanied by the trio, got down at Sadinpur from the train, Shyamal also disembarked on the off side, where there was no platform and walked away maintaining quite a distance to camouflage his presence behind the four. So far as the discussion went in the canteen, his family would accompany Sadhika to the unknown ashram in the distant horizon.

All the troubles that Shyamal faced now were of his own making. Although he fasted, he could not go to Tarapith to offer puja and ask Mother Goddess to forgive him this time. He should be allowed to live till Sayan completed his education. Shyamal thought that he had committed a crime. He had to atone for it by paying back with his life. 

He had a vision that could be variously ignored as hallucination by the uninitiated. The vision showed him that only the Mother Goddess could excuse him. For that he was required to visit Tarapith and stay away from his family. In spite of sincere efforts he could achieve neither.

Once he reached the precincts of the ashram, he would approach Sadhika for a place to stay, the groundwork for which was already completed in the railway canteen at Rampurhat, when he had indicated his intention to visit Sadhika's place.

His family would not be able to recognize him in his present incarnation of a man with a French cut beard and black goggles. At least that was what he hoped for.

"Once I reach the ashram, I would confide in Sadhika and ask for forgiveness of Mother Goddess through her." Shyamal thought as he continued to trail the foursome, maintaining quite a distance from them.

Then again his thought process took a detour. He thought: "How can I depend on someone whom I don't know at all? How can I confess to her? How can she be more dependable than my father, wife or son? If at all I decide to confess, that shall be to my family."

Then again he thought: "No, I must not confess to any human being. If I seek forgiveness, I should confess to the Goddess alone. But I don't know how to do that. I tried to run away from my family but ended up being tied with them more firmly. The more I struggle the more does the noose tighten. I cannot flee from this bondage."

Shyamal didn't have peace of mind and therefore the natural beauty of the countryside through which he was passing failed to evoke any response in him. He wanted to cleanse his mind of all the dirt and pollutants first.

Till that was done there won't be any end to his troubles. He wanted to live in this world. Life was so priceless. He didn't want to squander it away. He wanted to wash away his sin and live life happily forever.

For the present, however, Shyamal decided to continue with his disguise. Let time heal the malady from which he suffered. The special rituals, which Sadhika had planned for tonight, might show him some way out. He agreed to remain an optimist at least for this night.

He waited for sometime at the outskirts of the ashram till the visitors settled and Sadhika proceeded to her cottage. Shyamal straightway went to the temple and paid his obeisance to the deity installed there.

A spacious thatched dwelling, open on all sides, in front of the temple where devotees could take rest, sing hymns and devotional songs or just while away their time in search of solace, stood in front of the temple. The thatched place served as the marriage venue for local tribal people.

Shyamal had no luggage with him as his belongings were packed in Sefali's suitcase.  Exhausted beyond all limits, Shyamal needed rest. Thirst and hunger completely overwhelmed him in course of the day. Shyamal still continued his fast, simply because he forgot to eat.

He squatted beside one of the bamboo pillars of the open dwelling. The cool shade of the great banyan tree provided him with not only rest but mental solace also. The banyan tree, a great gift from God to mankind, proved that to Shyamal.

Then he remained thoughtless for some time. A cold shiver went down his spine, as some unknown entity appeared to enter his body. His eyes closed as he assimilated the energy. He continued to remain in a dazed state.